A Tough Week

On reflection its been a tough week. It's not nice when I have a brilliantly busy week like last week and then a very very quiet week afterwards. It's gone so fast and its only today I am happy with in terms of actually applying to jobs and showing my determination. I can't have another lacklustre week like this again. I guess I should look at the big picture and the positives. Things will simply get better and I know that. It's just hard sometimes at the end of the day when you've emailed all the contacts and applied to everything you can apply to. I need more things to do towards it. I know this time last week I was on a massive high about the position I was in and am in now with so many positive things to take from London so far. I beat over 200 people to a role in comedy. Can't have that happen and feel this dejected all in one week. So I will focus on that, only for a moment, and then be my usual self and get my head down under the opinions of positive and negative and focus on the job at hand.

Being lucky enough to get this role for the sketch show made me think about what I'm meant for. I think as far back to Primary School making other kids laugh with lame jokes, entertaining my friends in Secondary School in drama lessons, making up jokes, writing sketches, stand up one liners, sitcom ideas, and writing some proven comedy material throughout Uni and putting it to the test against the audiences and grade and coming out strong. Makes me think about what your born to do if that is a thing and not just a cheesy idea that people say about the greats. This isn't a 'second thoughts about whether I want to do acting' as my heart is in this through and through. It's more of a thought on what potential I have in front of me and how this could be the beginning of something really special and limitlessly enjoyable.

I keep thinking if I could get an agent by the end of the year then it would have been the most successful year of my life so far. But then I think, hang on, I've moved to London this year. I've passed a real life audition. I'm doing comedy which I love with all my heart. No screw that even, I'm doing what I love full stop. This has been such an important year. Already this is a success just moving to London and making that step let alone getting any jobs. The faith is growing as is the determination. I remember before I moved writing down to my future self that its all about tactics and territory. That I should start somewhere and call that my base and just slowly get my name out around that area and take over more and more territory. I have done that but in a different way. The people that I've met carry my name around with them now. I make sure I'm the name that will pop up in the inbox for the third time this week asking for jobs. My territory is already growing fast and I will keep it growing until people know exactly who I am, what I do, and the determination I have in my heart to be first to the role. Yes its been a tough slow week, but next week is a new game and I'm already prepared to make sure its one I can be proud of.

Building Up Steam

I didn't really think I'd be doing another blog this early after my last. I thought I would give it a few weeks of trying to hold some jobs down to have something worthy to write about, but after a call with my Dad I realised I actually have a heck of a lot to write about.

The successes so far to date have been 3 extra jobs for 2 music videos and 1 for channel 4 and a lot of contacts made. If there's one thing I've learnt so far from being an extra its that its dangerously close to the TV series Extras in a lot of ways. The theme so far seems to be that I will encounter one odd person out of all the extras I work with each project. If it is any more than one there will always be one who will exceed the amount of madness than any other. The first extra job I had for a music video included a guy who would laugh for about 2 minutes over nothing and seemed genuinely nuts. I'm not sure if I should be surprised at the high amount of crazy I meet or the lucky amount of people who are really brilliant to know. Already a guy I met at an extra job 6 days ago has asked me if I want to be involved with some more extra work in a few days time. Its showing already how important it is to know these important people and even more so how important it is to be friendly and courteous to the people I meet.

It was only yesterday I already felt truly happy with the position I am in right now. The weekend coming up will be one filled with filming a project for a 48 hour film festival which people have travelled from all over Europe to see and join. I just had an audition this morning for a comedy sketch show pilot in which I made the guy, who was part of the company and reading in for the other part, laugh half way through the audition and told me after that it takes a lot to make him corpse. I've got another audition next week for a photoshoot of a night out and getting some more headshots done with a friendly face. All these positive steps make me think about what I dreamt about happening when I moved to London. I know part of me dreamt about big things happening and really shooting up the ladder, but really yesterday I was so happy because at the moment this is a reality I could never have dreamt of happening after just 2 and a half weeks of living here. I have focused on my goals and I'm becoming a person I really doubted I could become.

London is truly what you make of it and I'm starting to believe I may have the determination and heart for what it takes to stay here for a long time. Its odd for me for the first time to have some real true self belief. I can't ignore that I am yet to have a low point and I'm sure it may come in the next few months but right now I'm living this dream that I created and composed myself, and I can only get stronger from here. I'm happy to say its looking more and more like moving to London truly was the best decision I've made so far in my life, and one that I want to look back on in 5 years time and know that this was the start of Sam Stevenson the professional actor.

My First Week In London

I had a brilliant blog all planned out for this. I would talk about the hardships of London and how scary things are at first and how I miss home, but really I'm absolutely loving it. I wasn't really sure what to expect when I got here. I really hadn't thought about what I would do with my time until my parents left and that was it. The London experience begins.

How the last week and 2 days have been is brilliant. I spent a good 5 days finding my feet getting to know where I live and spending a fair amount of money with horrifying ease. The area we live in is brilliant. My flatmate and I walked around the outskirts of Hampstead Heath on the first day which was beautiful. You notice immediately the changes of everyone in London compared to home. People are more open to talking in London. They aren't really louder here, they just talk more. You could talk to anyone so much easier than back home and a lot of the time you just find yourself in conversations you have no idea how they started.

My drink with actress Kate Hollowood set me straight. I always said starting Monday 10th September I would start work and I started it by asking for advice from an old friend. She gave me a plan, a starting place and a solid aim of where the bottom of the ladder was and how I could climb it. I was honestly pretty apprehensive about meeting with her expecting that I would leave thinking the way to start my acting career is impossible, but maybe that was just my worried mind gearing myself up for a nasty reality check. I left Kate feeling really positive. The reality check I got was that there's a lot of hard work ahead of me but entirely possible for me to achieve. She told me about how she had been in my position before and just seeing how successful she is now I was raring to go, and after a week and 2 days, I can't see myself being discouraged any time soon at all. We both agreed I'd be fine and would start climbing the ladder soon. (Determination kicks ass)

If I could draw a diagram of what I need to do it would look something like this:

Star in multiple short films to build up a showreel -->
Send showreel to agents -->
Agents impressed and call  to be my agent -->
Still no where near made it but boy are we doing great.

I always said luck is the heart of an actor a lot of the time and I do feel lucky with how this week has gone. I got cast as an extra in a Channel 4 sketch which will be shown in October for 'Stand up for Cancer', I've got an audition for a comedy sketch show which is trying to get on TV, and I will be in a film that is part of the 48 hour film festival later in September. I really can't complain how this week has gone but I know I need to work harder and harder to keep this up and get the bigger jobs. Really I feel it hasn't even started yet despite some good initial jobs, but I'm a fighter. I've got people back home to prove my worth to, people here I want to make proud, myself I don't want to let down, so negatives are now a thing of the past, dated, history. I'm here for an adventure and I'm excited to say its starting to look like a promisingly successful one.

And Then He Went To London

If I could achieve anything in the next year it would be to make people proud back home. A part of me does it for them. The people at work I was so much sadder to leave than I let on, the friends I camped with on my final weekend in Bournemouth, the family that believe wholeheartedly that I could make something of myself. I see it now. Some of the words that were said as I left by some people. I want to make these people so proud, and its easy to say I already have by doing this move, but I want them to look at me in a years time and say 'you did it'. I will not be happy with trying my utmost best and not making it. I am powered on peoples belief that I, Sam Stevenson can make my mark on London. I want to look at others in auditions and think 'you won't get this part because your not Sam Stevenson'. There's a hell of a lot of fight in this actor. If we were to take star sign personalities into account then, as a Gemini born in early June, I have enough passion to fight until I am the best actor I can be and be proud of who I am and just exactly what I conquered. I have a lot of work ahead of me that I have the heart to resiliently battle through.

This is it really isn't it? This is where life starts and I'm not ready at all, but that's ok. I predict I will have days far too full of doubt to not worry about, but that's ok too. I know wholeheartedly that I have the determination to stand up from those days and take the reigns of the dream. I want to smile through it all and remember no matter how serious things get, or how hard, know what's on the other side and chasing this dream will be the adventure of a lifetime.

I always thought on the journey up to London I would put on some sad music, think about home and just have some time to myself to be sad about what I'll miss. And that's exactly what I did, for about 15 minutes. I realised on the journey up its hard to be sad when you've got such an exciting time ahead, and that's what I felt. After the first 15 minutes of the journey successfully feeling sad I couldn't help but smile and feel so excited about where and what I'm moving to. And now I'm here I couldn't be happier. So now all that's left is to dive head first in and get battered and bruised and take control of this capital.